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Post by Lily Montgomery on Jul 5, 2010 1:02:02 GMT -5
It was four in the morning, and Lily was restless. Whenever she'd close her eyes, the nightmarish images of the abuse she's suffered, witnessed and even the death of her sister were floating in her head. She decided to slip into the library, still dressed in a night gown with her hair in a loose braid. Perhaps reading would get her sleepy enough to actually get a decent night's rest.
Once she arrived, she turned on the light that was in there. She was thankful that they had claimed the wing with the library since this was her sanctuary when things got really bad. She made her way over to the couch that was near the fiction section. She would hide behind this couch when Johan was looking for her. 'Sometimes Edward would hide with me' she thought, lightly touching the silver locket hanging from her neck.
She couldn't believe that one of her closest friends was now the most bitter enemy she had. 'If only things could go back to how they were' she thought, curling up at one end of the couch. She opened the locket to reveal a picture of Edward he had given her long ago. 'I really miss you' she thought, a few tears falling from her eyes. However, before she let a sob out, she heard the door creak open and she froze. She tucked the locket under the collar of her night gown and rubbed the tears from her eyes. "Who's there?" she asked softly.
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Post by Simon Lennox on Jul 5, 2010 14:37:40 GMT -5
Simon sat up with a start, breathing heavily. It took a moment for the images of the nightmare to fade, and he shook his head and ran his hands through his hair. With a sigh, he untangled himself from his blankets and through on the robe he kept at the end of the bed. It was unlikely that he would be able to get back to sleep for awhile. He got up as quietly as he could, and made his way out the door. At the moment, he had the small room to himself, but it wouldn't do to wake up the children in the other rooms.
He made his way, barefoot, down the hallway of the West Wing, where the Aristocrats lived. Fortunately, they had the wing with the library and it was always a refuge for those who couldn't sleep. He'd come here a lot, even before, though it had meant sneaking out of his room. He knew a number of hiding places in the library and had used them many times before.
Opening the door, he noted with surprise that the light was already lit. It seemed he wasn't the only one with bad dreams. A quiet voice called out to him, and he quickly answered.
"It's Simon," he said as he made his way over to the couch. He saw Lily there and stepped back a moment in surprise. He hadn't expected to see her here. One of the younger children, yes, but not Lily.
"Hello Lily, I'm sorry to intrude. Couldn't sleep?" he asked with concern.
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Post by Lily Montgomery on Jul 5, 2010 15:16:33 GMT -5
"Oh Simon, it's you" she said, letting out a sigh of relief, "yeah, I couldn't sleep, I kept having nightmares." Out of all the aristocrats, the only person she could speak to somewhat freely was Simon. "Even though we're in control now, I still have those dreams about what things were like before" she said softly, patting a spot on the couch so Simon could sit.
He was one of the few people who she could lower her guard to, and toss aside the mask of a cool, confident leader only to show the vulnerable girl that was beneath. "The worst of them is about my sister, Emily. I still can't believe she's gone sometimes" she said, doing her best to keep herself from falling apart.
The one thing that would haunt her until she leaves this place would be her sister's death. "I was her older sister yet I couldn't stop it from happening. I failed her, and no matter how much I try and rationalize it, I can't forgive not saving her" she said, looking at over Simon. She had always seen him as a big brother which was something she needed as a person who carried a heavy weight on her slender shoulders.
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Post by Simon Lennox on Jul 5, 2010 22:58:08 GMT -5
Simon took a seat and listened quietly while Lily spoke. He knew that she saw him as a big brother and someone to look up to. He felt honored that she would confide in him when she was upset and never grew impatient with her. He was always in her debt and in Edward's debt for making the pact with the Shadow Man. He would remain faithful to her forever.
"I understand. Sleep is very difficult here. And I know what you mean. A great deal of the time, I cannot believe that we finally hold the power. I've been here for so long . . ."
He trailed off and nodded as she spoke about Emily. They had lost her some time ago. She'd been a sweet child, if he recalled correctly. He hadn't known her well. Also, he'd blocked a number of memories from his childhood. He knew how hard it was for Lily, having lost her sister. His older brother was one of the very few children who had escape from St. Anne's successfully. Simon had tried to send Gabriel some letters, but was never sure where to send them too.
Still, it was a lot harder to have lost a sister. All of the children at St. Anne's grieved for the lost children. It was a weight they would carry forever.
"I know you miss her, but you cannot keep blaming yourself, Miss Lily," he said, gently. He often called her Miss Lily. It was his own little nickname for her.
"There was nothing you could have done. They had us trapped. Now, you have done so much for the other children and we are all grateful to you and to Edw- . . . you know who." Simon did not want to upset Lily more by mentioning Edward. Simon had always liked the other boy, but could not understand why he'd formed the Derelicts.
He reached over and put a hand on her shoulder. "You have done so much for everyone. Do not carry that burden alone."
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Post by Lily Montgomery on Jul 6, 2010 4:47:25 GMT -5
"I know you're all grateful, and I'm glad to know that" she said, laying her head on his shoulder. "I'd feel bad for allowing anyone to carry this burden since it's not one many can handle. I'm fine with knowing I have someone with a friendly ear who is willing to listen" she said softly, a small yet somewhat sleepy smile on her face. It was nice to know that not only did she have Simon, but the other aristocrats on her side. Though she could understand her rival's ideals, she felt that selfishness was an extremely adult traits, one that Lily despised since it caused the suffering.
"You can say his name, Simon, no need to censor yourself" she said, "he's nothing, but an enemy to me." She wish that she could say such a thing to where she herself would believe it, hell Simon probably didn't buy it either.
'After all, he knows me as well as Violetta' she thought. Though she was sure he didn't know the full extent of her feelings, he probably knew that she still cared for Edward despite the circumstances they were in. "I just don't understand why we've split in two. I mean, I do, but yet at the same time I don't. We've all suffered under the same people, shouldn't we all be on the same side" she said, looking to Simon for some sort of answer, something that someone who was older with more wisdom could say.
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Post by Simon Lennox on Jul 8, 2010 23:07:51 GMT -5
"You know that I always have a sympathetic ear ready for you, Miss Lily," said Simon with a quiet smile. As she changed the subject again, his smile faded. It was a topic they had discussed many times.
Simon sighed and reached over to pat her arm in a gesture of comfort. He knew Lily better than she thought he did and he could tell that there was more to the situation with Edward than she was letting on. Still, it was difficult not to get frustrated with the Derelicts. They ran rampant around the orphanage and refused to live in any semblance of order. While the idea might be nice for awhile, Simon understood that responsibilities did not go away because people pretend they aren't there.
"It's not that simple, Miss Lily. Yes, we all suffered under the same ill treatment from the adults, but we all had different ways for dealing with that. Now that we have the run of things, it's natural that people would disagree," he said. He paused a moment before continuing. "Edward and the Derelicts want to live in a way that is an extreme opposite to the life we lived under the adults. Unfortunately, they don't realize that this makes them more similar to the adults."
Simon sighed again. He'd hoped that the two groups might find some resolution, but it was highly unlikely. They were just too different.
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Post by Lily Montgomery on Jul 9, 2010 3:21:26 GMT -5
"I wish he'd open his eyes and see how selfishness is what drove the adults to do what they did to us" she whispered, her voice shaking ever so slightly as she spoke. If her vulnerable was showing a little before, it was out in the open, and she prayed that no one other than Simon would see. The pain she held of losing Edward would continue to haunt her for many years to come. Her shoulder began to tremble a bit, and a soft sob finally came out.
"Simon, it hurts so bad, knowing that Edward hates me, and that the boy I've known I really didn't know" she said, a few tears sliding down her cheeks. She decided it was too much to hide the heartache she'd been holding in for so long especially to someone she trusted deeply.
"I want us to be at peace, and just be able to work together to make sure what happened to us, never happens again" she sobbed up, hugging her knees to her chest and burying her face in her lap, ashamed at how weak she was being.
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Post by Simon Lennox on Jul 15, 2010 0:32:40 GMT -5
Simon wrapped his arm around Lily and pulled her close, hoping to find some way of comforting her. He'd always wanted a sister, and Lily had somehow managed to fill that void. She was as dear to him as a sibling and he felt protective of her. Still, there were times that he struggled to find the right thing to say. She and Edward had changed the fate of every child in the orphanage that day in the basement, and she was now shouldering a great deal of responsibility. Losing Edward had definitely been more hurtful to Lily than anything else.
"I am not sure what to tell you, Miss Lily. He and the other Derelicts do not want to see that. They want to rebel, to be able to act out like they were never able to before . . ."
The fact that Edward was leading that faction and the fact that he made it clear that he and Lily were now "enemies" was the worst part.
"I do not think that he truly hates you. Just like you do not hate him. I do not think it is possibly for either of you to actually hate each other. I believe that he still cares about you, but he cannot show it. He has become their leader, as you are ours. The Derelicts look up to him and since you are leading the Aristocrats . . . but things will change, Lily. Somehow, they will change."
Simon knew that was true. Eventually, they were going to have to leave St. Anne's. At least some of them would. And eventually, they were going to have to figure out what to do about the Shadow Man.
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Post by Lily Montgomery on Jul 15, 2010 2:06:22 GMT -5
Lily felt so safe when Simon wrapped his arm around her. He always seemed to know what to do to bring comfort to her. "I want to believe that he still cares for me, but yet when I look into his eyes, all I see is hatred of me and what I stand for" she whispers, "hopefully one day things will be good again." She lay her head on his shoulder as she began to think, wondering what would become of her after she had to leave.
"Simon, what will happen to me? I'm a girl so what is it am I to do when I leave?" she asked, her tone almost frightened by the thought. She knew that her gender wasn't held in any high regard, and knew that she didn't have much to look forward to once she left here so while she was in a position of importance, she'd enjoy it while she can.
"Will I have to marry to survive or sell my body? Those thoughts scare me that in three years that's all I'll have to look forward to" she said, her voice beginning to tremble once more. These particular thoughts she didn't voice at all. She needed to get them out to face them, perhaps even conquer them.
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